E3: Fable III

Peter Molyneux talks a good game. A master of hyperbole, his games are always cutting edge, revolutionary, on the door step amazing and uncharted video game territory. While the Fable games have never lived up to the Peter Molyneux Hype Machine, they've always turned out to be very good games. Fable II's simple three button fighting system proved to be fun as hell; easy to learn, rewarding once it's been mastered. Lionhead Studios has itself a nice thing to build on, and while Fable III's E3 trailer doesn't show much, it doesn't have to for you to know that the game has some promise.

I can't wait to have a threesome with a whore and my neighbor's wife. Then shoot the whore in the head. And watch as my neighbor's wife's tummy swells with my child. And laugh as my neighbor realizes the child isn't his and divorces his wife. Then stab my neighbor with a falchion, and move into his property to live with his widow. After she births my child, I will raise him to be as evil as I. And after incessant nagging, I will incinerate her with a fire spell, leaving my bastard child as I venture to a new town to complete the vicious cycle again while my son begins his own life of debauchery. Oh, Fable.

E3: Halo Reach, In Space!

Say what you will about the Halo series.. The story sucks. The improvements from game to game are marginal. The multiplayer isn't as good as Modern Warfare. Blah blah blah. Some of these detracting facts I have no choice but to agree with. Others, I'll argue with you until you're out of breath. 2010 brings another Halo game, and with it, it brings hype and excitement for some, cautious optimism or straight up doubt for others.

Consider me in the latter. I'm ready for Reach! I've always been a supporter of the Halo Series.. Except for Halo Wars, fuck that game. And maybe ODST, that was kinda disappointing. But Halo: Combat Evolved and Halo 2 were sick. And now, the series expands with.. Ready for this? Wait for it.. SPACE BATTLES! Hell yeah.