Zombies are dead. Well of course, they're reanimated corpses, what else would they be? Alright, let's take this from the top then. The zombie genre is dead. These days, anything starring the dead risen is laughably late to the party or trying to desperately cling to the waning corpse rush of the past few years. I tend to avoid zombie-centric media at all costs, save for a few exceptions, such as The Walking Dead. Surprisingly, I wasn't all too excited to play the game - which is based in the world of one of my favorite TV series - mostly because I'm no particular fan of point-and-click adventures. However, when a review code for The Walking Dead: Episode 1 landed in my lap, I couldn't let it go unplayed, and I am very happy with the end result.
Hit the jump to find out how you can win your very own copy of The Walking Dead: Episode 1!
The logo is heavily influenced by The Human Centipede
It was just last week. I was screaming at Skyrim along with fellow OBG conspirator Eric B., when we began to flesh out the details of an online Elder Scrolls game. You create your character, choose your race, and start in a predefined, racially logical area of Tamriel. You begin your quest learning the ropes on your own, and as you gain experience, you venture out farther in the world. Before long you meet with fellow players to systematically destroy whoever and whatever you want in the open world fashion that has endeared The Elder Scrolls series to us for all this time. As it was detailed, we pictured this title in the fashion of Borderlands, or Left 4 Dead; more of an online co-op experience than a massively multiplayer affair. You could enter instanced towns with hundreds of others to find a group of adventurers, or enter player-vs-player areas across the world. It is brilliant stuff, and I was convinced the idea would make us millions. Until it was pickpocketed. I'm absolutely convinced that Microsoft and ZeniMax have tapped Kinect mics, taken our idea, made some lawyer-proof changes, and pushed this thing out to the public in what I imagine to be two sleepless nights. Stolen Game Jam?! Nah, not really.
The Elder Scrolls Online has been in development since 2007 and is set for release next year, far eclipsing any timetable I could have imagined. I'm not worried about the time and effort placed into TESO, but rather the impact it will have on the future of Elder Scrolls games. If this online title is a hit, it's not a stretch to say future sinlge player Elder Scrolls games could suffer. MMOs are a time, money, and power-sink for everyone, dev and player side. If this title kills and becomes Zenimax's golden child and cash farm, all their focus could possibly go into upkeep and creating additional content, causing all other single-player games to suffer a lack of Skyrim (see: awesomeness.) Tamriel is a massive, lore-filled world ya know. On the flip, what if The Elder Scrolls Online burns to the ground like a fallen Blood Dragon? It's ashes scattered across the gaming world in the form of talented employees being absorbed by other studios like a soul of its former host. These situations do happen in worst case scenarios, and in these days of tight pockets, failure of a heavily invested MMO can be defined as a worst case. Of course, it's too soon to assume any failures or successes, but it can't hurt to speculate right?
We know The Elder Scrolls games come from a long line of successful titles, filled with action, adventure, and the open world before you. The Elder Scrolls Online is confirmed to be fully voiced, which is a positive notch in its belt. As a Star Wars: The Old Republic vet, let me tell you that a fully voiced MMO really lends to the immersion. We also know that ZeniMax Online Studios will be foregoing Skyrim's free and open battle system in place of a more typical hotbar system that most massive multiplayer titles use. Ooooh, not a good move here, guys. Part of what made Skyrim so exciting is how wonderfully combat was handled, and being able to do just about whatever you wanted to a ill-fated frost troll in real time. The point-and-click hotbar model will strip all that good and could make this title just another MORPG in an M market. Finally, and maybe most importantly, the open world and the affect the player has on it will be completely marginalized in the online realm. Previously, if I didn't like the room offered to me by an innkeeper, or the tone of voice a villager was giving me, I could snuff them out. Forever. Two years later, that innkeeper would still be dead, and that villager's wife would still be widowed. Or maybe, the widow married the innkeeper's husband, and had become the inn's de facto owner. That was the beauty of the game: the randomness, the finality, and the long-standing impact that came along with it. In a world co-owned by hundreds of thousands of other players, this type of dynamic is impossible. How will I be able to permenanty end any non-player character that glitches at me, when the Breton Mage aptly named Ishartedmyself needs that character to complete a faction-specific class quest? If these mechanics were allowed, Tamriel would be knee-deep in NPC corpses, and populated with nothing but players. Of course, if that were the case, the player base could be responsible for every facet of the world's success or failure, but that's a completely different discussion.
Early TESO concept art and screens. World of Warcraft, is that you?
To be completely fair, it's too early to say whether or not The Elder Scrolls Online could exist in a market that's already saturated with massive multiplayer online games. To be a complete dick, the departure of this title from the roots of whence it came could be a deal breaker. Sure, ZeniMax inherits the valuable online gamer's coin, but in doing so they stand to alienate the Elderly Scrollers who have been with the series since Daggerfall, and the newbs who fell in love with Oblivion and Skyrim. Failure here could cause a catastrophic ripple effect through the ranks of one of my favorite series. So please, don't Wabbajack this up, guys.
Do you guys think MMO is the way to go? Leave your thoughts below.
Remember that review I did a way back in the olden day about Ms. 'Splosion Man, a 2D platformer I really liked? Of course you do, because everything I write is as memorable as your first kiss in grade school (or college, whatever). It was a game I thoroughly enjoyed playing through, though it was available only to the limited audience of 360 owners. Twisted Pixel, developers who somehow manage to incite knee-slapping laughter from me time and time again, have now announced that their crazy pink lady of pure energy will be 'sploding on to PC, iOS and Windows Phone.
I hate most platformers on iOS like America hates Electronic Arts, however I have a good feeling about Ms. 'Splosion Man. The mechanics are less about twitch reflex on the controls and more about proper timing on your 'splodes. Controlling the mademoiselle with the undoubtedly horrid virtual control will take some getting used to, however clicking anywhere to 'splode will be a breeze. With the power to 'splode anywhere you go, there is no reason to not play this title, unless you own an Android phone. Buuuuuurned.
Ms. 'Splosion Man is due out for PC, iOS and Windows Phone some time this summer.
Last year, Shank crept up on me as a wicked little downloadable title about a revenge fueled killer with a penchant for style. A year later, the understandable success of the original has spawned Shank 2, a delicious yet familiar romp around a lovely, stylized 2D world. Are there enough additions to set the sequel apart from the first?
Borderlands 2 is making some noise with not only a release date, but a trailer to celebrate the release date. It doesn't have to make sense, if it's awesome. And this is most definitely awesome.
I was pretty late to the party with Borderlands, not playing until mid-2011 (judge all you want,) but after finally experiencing the dopeness I'm thinking Borderlands 2 is going to be a day 1 get. Dual wielding heavy machine guns? Fat woman cleavage? Ninja? A robot doing the robot? BAZILLIONDIER? Sold.
It ain't hard to tell. I excel, then prevail. It also ain't hard to tell that I have fallen out of love with Capcom recently, mostly due to their business practices rather than the games they develop and publish. After having told myself I would swear off any purchases of new Capcom games in 2012 (used games are fair play), they had to go and release this Street Fighter X Tekken trailer - in which Akuma goes bat-shit. Also M. Bison, Ogre, etc, etc.
Seriously, this finishing move takes all of Akuma's prior super moves and drops a hot load on them. I liked Street Fighter X Tekken, but I didn't want to buy it new out of principle. But damn, this just done changed my mind. Good job Capcom. I will buy even though you'll release Hyper Super Street Fighter X Tekken Arcade Edition before 2013 rolls around.
Let's see Tokido pull this one off at the next EVO.
In case you may not have heard, Shank 2 has released! As I toil away here at work, I am imagining what it would be like to put on the bandana (and chainsaw, and machete, and shotgun, and pistols, etc) again. Just the thought is making me glow like a New Jersian guido.
The original Shank was a wild romp of blood, weaponry, and style; three things that rank highly on my food chart of consumable dopeness. Look for a review up here very soon, but in the mean time you should probably play it yourself. With better visuals, more ridiculous scenarios, outrageous costumes, and tightened gameplay, I think Shank 2 will be worth your $10.
The Independent game scene is a frequent mess, but here is Dustforce to clean things up in this early part of 2012. Half tricky platformer and half high-school janitor, Dustforce has the allure of simplicity skinned over a core of wicked difficulty by way of its demand for perfection. Wanna know why you would play a game about cleaning?
I apologize for not taking the time out of my schedule sooner to discuss Dustforce. It's one of those games that I've been following closely, though I've never quite had the time to share with you. I figured this would be as good a day as any to bring Dustforce to light, since it will be releasing on Steam on January 17, a mere two days time.
Dustforce is a game about cleaning. Say what? Yes, cleaning. Like myself and many other level-headed adults, you probably hate cleaning. So, this raises two questions. First, why would anyone make a game about cleaning? And second, why should you care about that game? How bold and brash of developers Hitbox Team to create a title centered around such a hated chore! Dustforce takes your grade school janitor, gives him the skill-set of a ninja, puts you in control, and says "have fun!" How could that not be enjoyable? You air dash, double-jump, and wall jump through 50 plus dust, leaf, slime, and garbage infested stages in which you sweep, buff, and vaccuum while fending off polluted pugilists. Don't brush it off, because it really looks like a bucket of fun.
Dustforce has all the makings of an OBG classic. Unique, stylish art and animation? Smooth, fast-paced action? Head-noddable soundtrack? Replays? Leaderboards? Yes. And though it's local only, they've even included multiplayer modes for the group of friends or family who clean together. I hate cleaning, but I think I'll love Dustforce. Get it on Steam on January 17.
Abobo's Big Adventure is a good 2-3 hours of old-fashioned NES greatness. If you were a gamer in the 80s or 90s you should not miss this homage to classic gaming and culture of decades past. Abobo throws in a little bit of everything that made the Nintendo such a killer get back in the day: Double Dragon, Super Mario Bros., The Legend of Zelda, Mike Tyson's Punch Out, etc. Respect is paid everywhere and it never gets old. Except perhaps the Balloon Fight stage, that shit sucked. Everything else though is thoroughly on point!
How can I sum up a game that is full of hilarious what-the-fuck moments? With the clip below, which not only made me el-oh-el, but also forced me to shout "Oh shit!" Yes, it's that good. With such a wide variety of jovial insanity to be found in Abobo's Big Adventure, I wonder which scene will make you comically shoot milk from your nostrils?
Abobo's Big Adventure is free to play and runs in your web browser. If you have some time to spend, I don't know why you're not playing this game. You should have stopped reading this boring ass article three paragraphs ago and unleashed some shirtless brown fury on Kung Fu Huggers.
Monday, May 14, 2012 at 12:06PM ;){kind=logo}
